Support in special life situations

Everything for a life in balance

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Talking about what connects us – understanding needs in couple relationships

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Serendipity - When luck comes knocking by chance   

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World Cancer Day on February 4, 2025 - Understanding and preventing cancer

Cancer is one of the most serious diseases of our time, affecting millions of people worldwide. But what exactly happens in the body when cancer develops and how can we effectively prevent it? This article sheds light on the causes of cancer and provides valuable insights into preventive measures that everyone can take to reduce their personal risk.

The development of cancer and the risks we can influence

Cancer starts at the cellular level: our cells divide regularly, renew themselves and repair damage. The body's own repair mechanisms play a decisive role in this process. However, these mechanisms can fail to work or be overloaded - for example due to the natural ageing process, genetic mutations or long-term stress such as smoking, alcohol, UV radiation or pollutants. If damaged cells are not repaired in time, they can multiply uncontrollably and cause cancer.

The perception of cancer is also interesting: we often associate it with dark colors or spots. This is because tumor cells often contain pigmented substances or cause color changes due to inflammation in surrounding tissue. This is particularly evident in skin cancer, as melanocytes - the pigment cells of the skin - divide uncontrollably.

Another decisive factor for the risk of cancer is smoking and alcohol. Tobacco consumption damages the cells directly through carcinogenic substances such as tar and benzene. These substances attack the DNA and trigger mutations. Alcohol also has a toxic effect: in the body, alcohol is broken down into acetaldehyde, a substance that damages cells and can inhibit DNA repair. The combination of smoking and alcohol further increases the risk, as the harmful substances potentiate each other.

Sun protection also plays a central role in cancer prevention. UV radiation penetrates the skin and causes DNA damage that can no longer be repaired with frequent and intensive exposure. This leads to mutations that can trigger skin cancer. Childhood sunburns in particular increase the risk. A conscious approach to sun exposure and the use of protective measures such as sun cream and suitable clothing are therefore essential.


How you can actively prevent

A healthy lifestyle is the basis of all cancer prevention. A balanced diet provides the body with important nutrients, strengthens the immune system and has an anti-inflammatory effect. Fruit, vegetables, wholegrain products and healthy fats help to prevent harmful processes. At the same time, processed foods, red meat and sugar should be consumed in moderation, as they promote inflammation and can increase the risk of certain types of cancer. Exercise is another important factor: regular physical activity helps to prevent obesity and regulate metabolic processes that influence the risk of cancer.

Screening examinations are also an essential part of prevention. For women, this includes regular gynecological checks, mammograms and HPV vaccinations. Men should have prostate and bowel examinations. Many of these measures are covered by health insurance and often only a small co-payment is required. Prevention means detecting diseases early and significantly increasing the chances of recovery.

A lifelong process of mindfulness

Cancer prevention is not a one-off decision, but an ongoing task. Our lives are precious and how we deal with them is in our own hands. Those who engage in prevention at an early stage and adapt their lifestyle have the opportunity to benefit from a healthy life in the long term.

"Health is not everything, but without health everything is nothing." - Arthur Schopenhauer

This thought reminds us that our health is the basis for a fulfilled life. Start being mindful of your body today - for yourself and for the people who are important to you.

Do you have any questions or need individual support?

Our life counseling service is available at any time for further information or individual support needs. You are welcome to arrange a non-binding, personal consultation at:

E-mail lebensberatung@benefitatwork.de | 24/7 Life Counseling 0331 231 879 33 | Telephone Counseling 0331 231 879 40

On March 20, we celebrate World Happiness Day - an occasion to reflect on what happiness actually means. But not all luck is pure coincidence. Serendipity, an English term, describes the lucky discovery of something valuable that you weren't even looking for. The origin of the word goes back to an old Persian tale about the "Three Princes of Serendip", who made valuable discoveries by chance and clever observations.

But how can we consciously promote serendipity? And what makes this kind of happiness so special? Let yourself be inspired by how small, unexpected discoveries can enrich your everyday life.

Serendipity vs. happiness - what's the difference?

Happiness is often described as something that happens to us - winning the lottery, a pay rise or perfect weather on our wedding day. But there is a special form of luck that differs from pure chance: serendipity.

The term describes the phenomenon of discovering something valuable or useful without having specifically looked for it. It can be an unexpected encounter with an old friend in a foreign city, finding a book that fits your current life situation perfectly or a spontaneous idea that solves a problem you've been stuck on for a long time.

How does serendipity arise?

Serendipity often happens when you are curious and open to new experiences. While happiness usually appears passive, serendipity requires a certain attitude:

  • Openness to new things - Those who go through the world with open eyes often discover the unexpected.
  • Courage to be spontaneous - Sometimes the best experiences come from unplanned decisions.
  • Make connections - Chance encounters can lead to valuable opportunities.
  • Appreciate unexpected discoveries - The Velcro fastener was inspired when an engineer realized after a walk in the woods that burrs were stubbornly clinging to his clothes. Sometimes the best ideas come from close observation in everyday life.
  • Say "yes" more often - Whether it's an invitation or a new task, unexpected opportunities arise when you keep an open mind.
  • Get out of your comfort zone - A different hobby, a new travel destination or a conversation with strangers can open surprising doors.

Everyday situations in which serendipity works

Perhaps you have already experienced how an unplanned detour has led you to a charming café that you would otherwise never have discovered. Or that a conversation with a stranger turned into a valuable insight. Such moments happen more often if you are prepared to embrace the unexpected.

Conclusion: Allow the unexpected to happen!

Serendipity is the art of recognizing and taking advantage of happy coincidences. While luck usually just happens, you can actively allow serendipity into your life. Luck Day is a wonderful opportunity to go through life with an open mind - because who knows what serendipitous surprises await you. Maybe reading this article will be your first serendipity today ... or your next inspiring experience is waiting for you in our guided meditation.

Do you have any questions or need individual support?

Our life counseling service is available at any time for further information or individual support needs. You are welcome to arrange a non-binding, personal consultation at:

E-mail lebensberatung@benefitatwork.de | 24/7 Life Counseling 0331 231 879 33 | Telephone Counseling 0331 231 879 40

Many couples talk to each other every day - about appointments, organization, everyday life. And yet there is often a feeling of talking past each other. Conflicts rarely arise because people don't talk enough, but because what is really important remains unspoken: Needs for closeness, recognition, security or relief. Successful communication therefore does not mean avoiding arguments, but rather recognizing and expressing needs and allowing them to be properly met by the other person.
 

Needs as the core of a relationship
 

Needs are universal. Every partnership is characterized by the desire for connection, appreciation and understanding. It becomes more difficult when needs are not clearly stated. Instead, they are often expressed indirectly - as criticism, withdrawal or anger. The actual desire behind them remains hidden. Learning to separate needs from accusations creates the basis for honest and connecting conversations.
 

Why conversations fail despite good intentions
 

Many misunderstandings are not caused by what is said, but by what is heard. A sentence can be understood very differently - depending on what the other person is reacting to. This is exactly where Friedemann Schulz von Thun's four-sided or four-ear model comes in. It shows that every message is sent and received simultaneously on four levels. The four levels of a message are

  • Factual level: What is being communicated factually? What information does the sentence contain?
  • Self-revelation: What is the speaker saying about themselves, their feelings or needs?
  • Relationship level: What does the statement say about the relationship? How does the other person feel addressed or evaluated?
  • Appeal: What should the other person do, think or change?

In couple relationships, it is particularly common to listen with the relationship or appeal ear - even if only a factual observation or an unspoken need was actually meant. This is exactly where misunderstandings, injuries and conflicts arise. The following examples show how differently one and the same sentence can be understood - and what need is behind it in each case.
 

The four-ears model in couples' practice
 

Example 1: "You came home late today."

  • Factual level: You arrived later than planned.
  • Self-revelation: I felt alone.
  • Relationship level: I don't feel important.
  • Appeal: Next time, be home earlier or let me know.

If the sentence is heard primarily with the relationship ear, it quickly feels like a reproach - although it may only be based on a need for closeness.
 

Example 2: "The household is completely up to me at the moment."

  • Factual level: I'm currently doing most of the chores.
  • Self-revelation: I'm tired and overwhelmed.
  • Relationship level: I feel left alone.
  • Appeal: Support me more in everyday life.

This is where the need for relief and fairness lies. If only the appeal is heard, the result is defense instead of understanding.
 

Example 3: "You've been on your cell phone a lot lately."

  • Factual level: You use your cell phone a lot.
  • Self-revelation: I miss our time together.
  • Relationship level: I don't feel seen.
  • Appeal: Give me more attention.

Here too, the "ear" decides whether a conversation connects or escalates.
 

What couples can learn from this
 

The model makes it clear: it's not about always formulating things perfectly. The key is to remain curious. To ask questions instead of interpreting. For example: "What exactly do you mean right now?" or "What do you need in this situation?" This makes conversations more open, reveals needs and clarifies misunderstandings early on.

It is also helpful:

  • I-messages instead of generalizations
  • Specific situations instead of sweeping criticism
  • a quiet moment instead of stressful discussions
     

Use support before distance arises
 

Some conversations remain difficult - especially if topics have been unspoken for a long time or patterns have become entrenched. Support can help you to sort out your own needs and find new ways of communicating. benefit at work offers a confidential counseling framework for individuals and couples to reflect on relationship issues, communication patterns and personal expectations. A neutral view from the outside is often enough to get people talking to each other again.
 

Relationship as a joint learning process
 

Successful communication is not a state, but a process. Needs change, life phases change, expectations shift. Couples who are willing to listen, ask questions and communicate strengthen their connection in everyday life. Not every conversation has to be perfect, but every honest conversation can create closeness and keep the relationship alive.

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When cancer affects your own environment – orientation and support for relatives and colleagues

A cancer diagnosis changes many things - not only for the person with the disease, but also for their family, social and professional environment. Relatives, friends and colleagues are often faced with the question of how they can provide support without becoming overwhelmed and how they should deal with their own fears, worries and uncertainties. World Cancer Day on February 4 is a reminder that cancer is always a psychosocial issue.
 

When cancer affects those around you
 

Cancer rarely affects just the person with the disease. It affects the entire environment - partnerships, friendships, families and even everyday working life. People close to you often experience a mixture of worry, helplessness, compassion and uncertainty. Many wonder how they should react, what is appropriate and how much closeness or distance is good at any given time.

This uncertainty is normal. Cancer brings topics such as vulnerability, finiteness and loss of control into everyday life - topics for which there are often no suitable words. It is important to know: There is no right or wrong way to behave. Everyone deals with the situation differently, both the person with cancer and those around them. Orientation does not come from perfect reactions, but from attentiveness, openness and respect for individual needs. In the rest of this article, you will find specific ideas on how mindfulness can succeed in the working environment and how people can better deal with their own feelings and boundaries.
 

Cancer in the work environment – guidance for teams and managers
 

When cancer affects colleagues or employees, special challenges often arise in the workplace. Teams want to provide support, but don't know how much closeness is appropriate. Managers are faced with the task of mediating between care, organization and operational requirements. At the same time, there is often a fear of saying the wrong thing or overstepping boundaries.

An approach that combines consideration and normality is helpful. Open communication - within the framework of what the person concerned wishes to share - creates clarity. Small gestures of sympathy, flexibility in working hours or understanding for fluctuations in performance can provide relief. At the same time, work can also offer stability and structure, if desired.

Possible offers of support in the working environment can be

  • flexible working time models or temporary adjustments to tasks
  • Clear agreements within the team to reduce uncertainty
  • Offers of talks for those affected, colleagues and managers
  • Psychosocial counseling for emotional relief
  • Information and presentations to raise awareness

A supportive working environment is not created through perfect solutions, but through attitude: listening, taking things seriously and working together to find sustainable solutions.
 

Showing support - without pressure and without expectations
 

Many people want to "do everything right" when dealing with cancer. They ask themselves how they can provide support, what words are appropriate and whether their behavior is helpful. This uncertainty is understandable. At the same time, it often creates an inner pressure to actively help or comfort - even if you are still shocked, emotionally overwhelmed or speechless.

It is important to remember that support does not have to be immediate or perfect. You don't need grand gestures or well-formulated sentences. It is often enough to remain honest and name your own insecurities. Statements such as "I don't know what to say right now, but I'm thinking of you" or "I'm here if you need me" can be more relieving than well-intentioned advice or slogans.

It is just as legitimate to keep your distance at first or not offer any help. Especially if you realize that the person who is ill needs rest - or if you yourself feel that your own emotional burden is too great at the moment. Not overburdening yourself is not a sign of indifference, but an important part of dealing with the situation with care.

Some people want support because they feel they have to do something. This is also understandable. It is crucial to be aware of your own limits and at the same time remain open to the pace of the person who is ill. Help can be offered without imposing - and it can also take place at a later point in time.

It is helpful to let go of expectations: There is no need to comfort, motivate or offer solutions. Listening, showing compassion or simply being present - even in small, quiet moments - can go a long way.
 

Accept support - no one has to go through this time alone
 

Psychosocial support can help to sort out thoughts, classify feelings and gain new perspectives - for those affected as well as for relatives or colleagues. benefit at work offers confidential psychosocial counseling as well as a consultation service that creates space for personal questions and relief. In addition, the lecture program includes thematic offerings. In February, to mark World Cancer Day, and again in March with a focus on bowel health, further content on the topic of cancer will be provided. These offers can provide orientation, impart knowledge and help people to cope better with the situation.
 

A sign of solidarity
 

World Cancer Day is a reminder of the importance of compassion, openness and mutual support. Cancer cannot be talked away - but treating each other with care can provide support. Listening, showing understanding and accepting help are steps that no one has to take alone.

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From resolution to habit: setting goals, implementing them and sticking to them

The turn of the year has a special meaning for many people. Psychologically, it marks a clear cut: one chapter ends and a new one begins. This moment invites us to pause, reflect on the past year and look ahead. This is precisely why many people set themselves new goals at the beginning of the year. Formulating goals provides orientation, strengthens the feeling of self-efficacy and conveys the feeling of being able to actively shape one's own life instead of just reacting to external circumstances.

At the same time, the experience of many people shows that good resolutions quickly lose their significance in everyday life. Not because the goals are wrong, but because it often remains unclear how they can actually be implemented. This is exactly where this article comes in. It shows how goals can be formulated realistically, implemented in everyday life and maintained in the long term - with clear structures, psychological insights and the SMART method as a helpful tool.
 

Formulate goals clearly with the SMART method
 

The SMART method helps to turn good intentions into concrete and achievable goals. It helps you to formulate clear, realistic goals that are suitable for everyday use. The following three examples show you how a goal can be built up step by step according to the SMART criteria.
 

Example 1: Healthier eating

Specific: I want to eat a more balanced diet.
Measurable: I cook fresh food four days a week.
Attractive: I want to feel more energetic and do something good for my body.
Realistic: Four cooking evenings can be easily integrated into my everyday life.
Scheduled: I set myself this goal for the next three months.

  • SMART formulation:
    "I will cook fresh food four days a week from February to feel more energetic in the long term."
     

Example 2: More exercise in everyday life

Specific: I want to exercise regularly.
Measurable: I go for a 30-minute walk or jog three times a week.
Attractive: Exercise helps me to reduce stress and feel fitter.
Realistic: Three sessions per week are easily achievable.
Scheduled: I start immediately and review my goal after eight weeks.

  • SMART formulation:
    "From now on, I will exercise three times a week for 30 minutes each time to increase my fitness and reduce stress."
     

Example 3: Less time on my cell phone and better sleep

Specific: I want to reduce my cell phone time in the evening.
Measurable: I put my cell phone away after 9 pm.
Attractive: I want to sleep better and fall asleep more relaxed.
Realistic: A fixed time is easy to stick to.
Scheduled: I will test this routine for four weeks.

  • SMART formulation:
    "I'll put my phone away from 9 p.m. to improve my sleep quality over the next four weeks."

This makes it clear that a SMART goal is not complicated, but clear, personally meaningful and realistic. It provides orientation and increases the likelihood of actually sticking to it.
 

From planning to implementation
 

Big goals can quickly seem overwhelming. That's why it helps to divide them into small stages. Each stage brings a sense of achievement and boosts motivation. Write down your goals, visualize them or use reminders in your everyday life - such as a weekly plan, a cell phone reminder or a notebook. Studies show: Those who start within the first 48 to 72 hours use existing motivation particularly effectively.
 

Stick with it: How new habits are formed
 

Habits are not formed overnight. Research shows that it can take an average of around 6 to 10 weeks for new routines to become stable - depending on the person and their behavior. The decisive factor is not perfection, but regularity.

Helpful here:

  • Start small and remain realistic
  • Link new habits to existing routines
  • Make progress visible
  • Accept setbacks as part of the process

Lapses in motivation are normal. The important thing is to get back on track afterwards - without reproaching yourself.
 

Recognize and consciously reflect on successes
 

If you only look at the end goal, you often overlook your own progress. A monthly recap can help: What went well? What has changed? What am I proud of? Consciously recognizing successes strengthens self-confidence, motivation and self-esteem. Goals can also change over time - the important thing is to give yourself attention and recognition.
 

Understanding goals as a companion
 

Annual goals are not a rigid compulsory program, but a support for personal development. Clearly formulated, implemented in a way that is suitable for everyday life and accompanied by patience, they can facilitate real change. The decisive factor here is not perfection, but regularity, self-reflection and a benevolent view of your own progress.

It can be supportive not to pursue goals alone, but to embed them in fixed structures. The benefit at work lecture program provides you with a regular exercise program that can help you to keep at it and consciously take time for change. Common impulses and recurring exercises facilitate implementation in everyday life and strengthen your motivation to stick to your goal step by step.

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From Boomer to Gen Z: Generational diversity in the workplace

Today's working world is characterized by a great diversity of generations. This ranges from the baby boomers to Generation X and Y to Generation Z, which is currently entering the labor market. This brings together different opinions, views and needs. In this article, the focus is on taking a closer look at the different generations, how generational diversity creates new opportunities and what role managers play in this.
 

Values, attitudes and needs of the generations
 

For the Bommer, work is a central area of life that shapes their identity. They are also very loyal to their employer. Key aspects for the boomer generation are a sense of duty, performance orientation, reliability, clear structures, responsibility and hierarchies.

Generation X, meanwhile, feels a strong need for independence and personal responsibility. For them, issues such as fair remuneration, transparency and competence orientation as well as the compatibility of career, family and personal interests play a major role.

Generation Y has the central point in mind that work should fit in with life, and they are looking for meaningfulness in their work. A feedback culture, flat hierarchies, flexible working models and mobile working are important to them. This generation also includes many high performers who often suffer burnout at a young age.

Generation Z attaches great importance to stability and mental health. They separate their professional and private lives very clearly and deal well with the issue of diversity. Fixed structures, clear rules, fair pay and the opportunity to develop and learn play a major role for them.
 

A space for new opportunities
 

Even if the different generations could not be more different, generational diversity offers a great opportunity. New ideas and fresh perspectives can be combined with old knowledge to create innovations. It is important that companies consciously create a space in which employees from different generations can get to know each other, exchange ideas and learn from each other. Different generations can consciously contribute their respective strengths and learn from each other. While older generations have many years of experience, sound specialist knowledge, reliability and a structured way of working, younger generations are characterized by digital skills, a high willingness to learn and confidence in using new tools. The combination of these strengths creates different perspectives that contribute to better decisions. At the same time, new working models, future-oriented strategies and modern learning and development cultures can be developed.
 

Leadership that connects generations
 

Managers play a central role in this. They create the framework in which diversity is experienced as a strength. Transparent communication, cross-generational teams, clear expectations and an open error culture are crucial to promoting trust. It is equally important to take individual needs seriously. Not everyone in a generation is the same. It is therefore all the more important to respond to this diversity.
 

Different backgrounds, shared future
 

Companies will remain successful in the future if they recognize generational diversity as a potential and resource rather than a problem. If they succeed in responding to the different needs and combining the different views, this not only strengthens the company, but also the performance and health of each individual. Generational diversity does not mean aligning, but rather developing future-oriented solutions together and strengthening cooperation.

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Time for yourself - Meditation exercises with Carla 

Micro-break for your nervous system - a mindful mini-break with active exercise

Take some time out for inner peace: in our meditation exercise, a soothing journey through the nervous system awaits you with our certified yoga and relaxation trainer Carla.